Guest Post: 'Everyone Was Wrong and Everything Was Stupid'
In which a former student reckons with an exceptional student essay by legendary Essays in Journalism and now Travel Writing student Paul Z
I just sent out midterm feedback for my Travel Writing students. I’m sure some of them have intense feelings for me right now.
I get it! It hurts to have someone say that your creation isn’t perfect.
I’m wrestling with the same thing, going over my edits for that magazine piece. The notes from two editors who dipped into my draft exceed the words I wrote originally. Among the feedback bits: “This just isn’t working at all.”
It doesn’t feel good! Even three decades into my writing career, that kind of assesment stings. But I lower my shoulder, and I push back. Because good writing takes WORK.
Derek L. was an exceptionally bright, funny, and dedicated student in my fall composition course. His creative output was dynamic, unique, and surprising. Best of all, he was so eager to learn he never stopped innovating and trying new things.
Imagine my glee when he wrote in with the following, responding to Paul Z.’s recent mini-essay.
Dear Professor Deuel,
I loved Paul’s essay. I respect his approach to politics -- his ability to take a step back and consider the reasoning of those with whom he disagrees, even acknowledging his responsibility for similar tendencies. He doesn’t state his political opinions as fact but takes ownership of his perspective.
One line that stuck out to me: “His affect emanated from him like the smell of fermented meat; it’s that feeling when you answer a professor’s question, and you’re left lightheaded and rapidly repeating what happened in your head to ascertain whether you were cringe or not.”
This line’s imagery captured my attention but took on more significance as I continued reading. In a lecture hall, no one gives an uncertain response to learn from wrong answers; they only do so to demonstrate their proficiency and gain their professor and classmates' approval. Similarly, Dan and Dave were not engaging in meaningful political discourse. Instead, they asserted their position upon the audience and seeked confirmation.
I suppose I’m no different. That line stuck out to me because it resonated with how I feel about American politics. Paul demonstrates his self-awareness by admitting this: “I thought that everyone was wrong and everything was stupid, which aroused my instinct to avoid interaction with anyone I didn’t agree with by walking away. People were there to reinforce their identity’s salience, and to win.”
His story has no happy ending. His cynical quip about learning Chinese or Russian mirrors my consideration of brushing up my Spanish and moving to Spain; maybe I’ll study abroad next summer and treat it as a trial run. Jokes aside, I feel his takeaway is dour to the point of counterproductivity. I agree with his sentiment that we are witnessing one of the most dire political environments in American history. I don’t believe our country is unsalvageable -- fixable problems can feel insurmountable in the moment -- but I do believe it will become so if we concede and give up on fixing it.
Perhaps that’s a discussion for another day. I have to wake up early for a class tomorrow morning, and it’s probably a good time to sleep. I appreciated the opportunity to put my thoughts onto a screen once more like we did last quarter. I wish you a great spring quarter!
Sincerely,
Derek
Which negative feedback—and from whom?—is haunting you right now?